Emotional Intelligence
By Stephanie NewittEmotional Intelligence is defined as the capacity to be aware of, control, and express one's emotions, and to handle interpersonal relationships judiciously and empathetically. It is the key to both personal and professional success.
Helping your child develop "emotional intelligence" is an important journey on which to embark. Emotions of the gifted are often deep and poignant and therefore can be difficult for the individual to identify and process. Helping your child learn to identify their emotions is the first step, and using an emoticon sheet similar to this one, can help them label their emotion.
Dimensions of Emotional Intelligence
Emotional intelligence is made up of the following:
1. Knowing
one's emotions
2. Self-awareness,
or the ability to recognize a feeling as it happens, is the cornerstone of
emotional intelligence. Being aware of our moods, thoughts, and feelings about
our moods is necessary to manage emotions.
3. Managing
emotions
4. Managing
feelings so that they lead to appropriate behavior is a critical ability that
builds on self-awareness.
5. Motivating
oneself
6. Enthusiasm
and persistence in the face of anxiety, fear, and setbacks set achievers apart.
Believing that you possess the will and the way to master events is a critical
predictor of success in school and life.
7. Recognizing
emotion in others
8. Empathy
builds on self-awareness and applies it to others. It is a fundamental skill
that is essential to successful interpersonal interactions.
9. Handling
relationships
10. The
art of relationships is, in large part, measured by how well we can manage the
emotions of others, and how well we are able to recognize and respond to those
emotions with appropriate behavior.
Emotions are a natural part of being human and are
part of our everyday experiences. Helping our gifted children first label
their emotion and then understand that their emotions are natural is important,
especially since the emotions of the gifted are often felt very deeply. This lets them know they are in a safe place
to identify and process their deep emotions.
They can then be better guided on appropriate expressions of those
emotions.
Preparing for Parent Teacher Conferences
If you feel the need to discuss with your child's teacher your child's emotional intelligence, you may wish to discuss pragmatic emotional labeling, a safe place for them to process their deep emotions, and the need for your child to receive encouragement on this journey.Parent Modeling of Emotional Intelligence
Some tips for parents from an article on EQ
from the Mom Agenda website:
1. Encourage ‘I’ statements.
Encourage the habit of expressing what
you feel instead of what’s wrong (or right) with a situation. For example, “I
feel mad when you say mean words like that,” or “I feel happy inside when you
share with me.”
2. Know ahead of time what
to say during an emotional display. Many parents “shoot from the hip” when trying
to calm down an emotional toddler. There is a great sense of satisfaction that
comes from knowing at least how to start coaching your child through his strong
expressions of emotions before they occur. And, most importantly, you are more able to
control your own emotional reactivity and teach effectively.
3. Model appropriate EQ
skills yourself. Children are always watching their parent’s
emotional reactions in everyday situations. In many ways, children mirror our
own behavior. Therefore, start identifying your own feelings, and be aware of
how you manage them. If you’re angry and yelling, chances are you’ll find your
child yelling too! Remember, “School is never out at home.”
Sources:
- Zernzach, Randall. “What You Need To Know About Your Child's EQ (Emotional Intelligence).” MomAgenda, Day Planners, www.momagenda.com/child-eq/.
- “Cultivating Emotional Intelligence.” Bright Horizons Family Solutions, www.brighthorizons.com/family-resources/e-family-news/2010-roots-of-success-cultivating-emotional-intelligence.
Part 4: Understanding Visual-Spatial
Learners
Stephanie Newitt is a co-founder of Gilbert Supporters of the
Gifted and a member of the GPS Gifted Education Parent Council Executive
Committee. She has a B.S. in Family Science and is the mother of four
gifted children, ages 14-24.
No comments:
Post a Comment