How to Talk About Giftedness Part 2 of 5 - Myths of Giftedness: Equality vs. Fairness

Recap of the January 2016 Gilbert Supporters of the Gifted Guest Lecture 

How to Talk About Giftedness - PART 2

Myths of Giftedness:  Equality vs. Fairness

In order to effectively talk about giftedness we need to understand myths vs. truth. 

So, let’s bust some myths about giftedness!

Myths, their background and impact

Myths are the result of:

—  The unclear understanding of giftedness affecting the development of the whole child.

—  A culture that does not understand or know how to deal with the traits and behavior of gifted individuals

A belief in these myths:

—  Perpetuates incorrect stereotypes and prevents empathy

—  Results in emotionally harmful reactions from society

“Good intentions do as much harm as malevolence if they lack understanding” – Albert Camus

The grandest myth is that All children are gifted. 

—  MYTH:  Giftedness is equated with the potential for eminence, achievement and success. 

—  TRUTH:  All children have gifts they can develop.  However, gifted individuals have brains, psyches and nervous systems that are hard-wired in such a way that their traits are only found in a small percentage of the population.

Want to become educated about how to debunk the 10 most common myths of giftedness?  Click here to take this link to our website.

Discussing Intelligence Creates Discomfort

Why is it uncomfortable to discuss intelligence?  Because -

—  Equality is at the heart of the American value system

¡  Our feelings about human value clashes with our ability to accept that some people are born with higher levels of potential than others

—  If we correct the misperception that giftedness is required for eminence, achievement and success, then there is NO CLASH .

—  All children are equal, but they are not all the same

—  Gifted children are special needs children

Fair isn’t everyone having the same, fair is everyone having what they need.

Now that we understand the importance of each of us debunking the myths of giftedness, and the difference between fair and equal, stay tuned for part 3 of this series, How to Talk About Giftedness:  What do giftedness and men’s height have in common?

How to Talk About Giftedness Part 1 of 5 - The Gifted Label and Changing Mindsets

Recap of the January 2016 Gilbert Supporters of the Gifted Guest Lecture

How to Talk About Giftedness -  PART 1 (of a 5 part series)

The Gifted Label and Changing Mindsets

Bringing Giftedness Out into the Daylight!  A.K.A. Talking to others about giftedness, the Elephant in the Room!

It’s difficult to discuss giftedness with others.  Will I, as a parent of a gifted child, be perceived as elitist?  Will their eyes roll and they not believe me when I say my kid has struggles too?  If I don’t talk about it, how will I find others who understand what I deal with every day?  How will I find what is needed to help my child grow? 

As parents of gifted kids, what can we do?

We can learn to comfortably talk about giftedness in order to help create change.  We can start right where we are by refusing to agonizing over a better word.  As we fight the battle of semantics we are losing the war.  We can help desensitize people to the word “gifted” by educating them on its FULL meaning.  We can stop concentrating solely on what gifted is and give equal due to what it is NOT.  We all know it is NOT a guarantee of success.  It is NOT a life on the yellow brick road.

We can form alliances and look for common ground because it builds empathy and support.  We can go beyond “preaching to the choir.”  We can recognize and use common vocabulary, such as “work ethic,” “emotional development,” “learning to deal with frustration and competition,” etc.

The Gifted Label 

The gifted label does have its benefits.  It is helpful when requesting services.  It is helpful in the legislative venue, whether it’s a local, state or national level.  If we can’t name this condition then we are stuck!  So, we must change the understanding of the label.  Labels have changed throughout history and we can do our part to change the understanding of the gifted label.   

(For an example from history on how some labels have changed from the 1960’s to now, see the personal boyhood incident of Dr. Ben Carson in the book Gifted Hands, p. 38-39)

When talking about the gifted label, don’t get bogged down in the detailed definitions like percentile rankings, IQ scores, etc.  In this war these are less important than describing characteristics.  Use your own passion and affiliations to:

·         Share with professionals  (pediatricians, family therapists, etc.)

·         Comment on social media

·         Be public: Respond to blogs, write articles, have conversations, conduct meetings, teach, present, etc.

The Problem and Its Roots

The problem exists because there is a reluctance in our society to discuss giftedness, and because of this the needs of gifted children are not addressed.

The Roots of this problem are due to the fact that -

1.       Society limits giftedness to education

2.       Myths about giftedness are entrenched

3.       The concept of intelligence creates discomfort

Giftedness is broadly misunderstood and is often discussed only in the context of eminence, achievement and success.  This fosters the perception of elitism and perpetuates the myth that only the gifted can be successful in life.  Also, across all disciplines giftedness is misunderstood to be a topic only about education.  However, giftedness affects the development of the whole gifted child – intellectually, socially, emotionally, etc.

Solving these problems requires changing deep rooted mindsets …

Commit to being part of the solution.  Commit to speaking up.  Commit to educate without being aggressive.

Now that we’ve laid some groundwork regarding our mindsets, part two of this series will provide tips on how to bust some common myths about giftedness.  STAY TUNED!

Article: "I Have a Gifted Kid and I Will No Longer Be Ashamed"

Here's a great article that we found on another website:

Yes, I have gifted children—born, not made. And I will no longer be ashamed to say my kids are gifted. …

… Here’s the deal. The word gifted does trigger thoughts of privilege and advantage, but it is the clinical term psychologists, doctors, and education professionals have used for years to identify and label children who were born with distinct cognitive differences—these differences can be good AND bad. It’s the way their brain was wired.

How can being gifted be a bad thing?

It can be a burden because too many in our society think gifted kids are the stereotypical straight-A, well-behaved students who get chosen to participate in those special, elite gifted programs at school and then graduate as valedictorians.

But, nope, not always.

Read the rest of the article HERE.  

SENGinars (March Seminars by Supporting the Emotional Needs of the Gifted)

SENG – Supporting the Emotional Needs of the Gifted is a national organization formed decades ago to support parents and healthcare professionals in caring for the needs of gifted children.  They frequently offer webinars – SENGinars – through their website.  The March SENGinars are listed below.  For registration or questions regarding these SENGinars, visit the SENG website.

  

March SENGinars

NEW! Continuing Education SENGinar March 12, 2015 Spiritually Gifted  Presenter: Patricia Gatto-Walden  Time: 7:30 pm Eastern [90 mins.]   Credits: 1.5  Participants will learn the inner world and outer manifestations of being spiritually gifted, understand more fully their insights and perceptivity, and subsequent daily life blessings and struggles.     SENG is approved by the American Psychological Association to sponsor continuing education for psychologists. SENG maintains responsibility for this program and its content. March 19, 2015  Gifted Children, Marriage Difficulties, Separation, and Divorce.  Presenter: Marc Caplan and Lori Comallie-Caplan Time: 7:30 pm Eastern [90 mins.]    There are many changes that happen through the process of a divorce - changes in parenting styles, living arrangements, even schools and access to their friends. How you approach the divorce process can help alleviate some of these stressors for the child.     Webinars are $40 for non-members and $30 for members (with discount code). Become a member today!  Every registered participant will have access to the full webinar recording approximately one week after the live event, regardless of attendance. SENGinars recorded prior to November 2014 are available in the SENG Store and newer recordings are available on our event page.

For registration or questions regarding these SENGinars, visit the SENG website.

Executive Function 101

Gifted 101 Meeting

One of the most important themes to take away from a Gilbert Supporters of the Gifted meeting, is that information creates understanding and power.  As parents, if we are informed about the characteristics, the strengths, the frequent behaviors, and the weakness of our gifted children, then we can facilitate more success in the home and in school.  There is a support system here.  You are not alone.  Feel free to view some of the documents that were passed out during the initial Gifted 101 meeting on September 4th.  We hope to see you again on November 13th.